Bought a Big Bat

“I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I’ve bought a big bat. I’m all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!”

- Dr. Seuss, Writer, 1904-1991
 

You just have to love Dr. Seuss!! There is no better way to start off a New Year than with an “ain’t nothing gonna break my stride” attitude.

Welcome back to Turn Around Tuesday. I want to take a quick minute to thank everybody who has been supportive through an interesting 2009. I’ll be taking you to lunch in 2010.

2009 was interesting for a good many people. I myself watched one business die, another one blossom and opportunities unfold. Lighthouse Leasing & Management has grown to over 200 properties in 4 counties. We are busy but we enjoy serving our owners by taking great care of their tenants. I received my long worked for brokers license in October. That allowed me to add a Keller Williams affiliation to my real estate tool bag. Possibility is bubbling like champagne for 2010!

However, some things got off track in an effort to create a laser focus and trim the fat, so to speak. Some things needed to derail and I will leave those in the train graveyard. Others are patiently awaiting my attention. TAT is one of those things. The conversations started over at MLWFY and Beautiful Chaos are others. Connection with people outside of my client/tenant list is a huge priority. I am appreciative for the patience and the boot in the butt I got from the folks who know how.

Today I encourage you to pick up your bat and swing away into 2010. I have a list of things I want to remember because I learned, leave in the past because they are useless or worse, distracting and stars I am shooting for in 2010. Most importantly, I have decided to get out of my head, over myself and on the ball. Granted, this is a work in progress and some days will be better than others. Yours will be too. Know what that makes us? Just like everybody else! Sing it with me - “Ain’t nothin’ gonna to
break my stride. Nobody’s gonna slow me down, oh-no, I got to keep on movin’…”

What’s Going On

Still For You
This section serves the same purpose as the sidebar did previously. Events, activities, promotions - whatever - submit them to me and I will do my best to get them listed here.relevant content, and they get exposure.

Anticipation Celebration & Burning Bowl Ceremony
Vicki Manibusan of Capstone Financial Partners in Savannah will be leading this event at Asbury Memorial United Memorial Church on Saturday, January 2, 2010, 2:00 pm.

Vicki describes the event as “a guided exercise to help you think about what you want to accomplish in the coming year.” Bring pen, paper, and a self-addressed stamped envelope. Vicki can be reached at (912) 222-9410 for info and RSVP.

Leadership Bryan County
The next Leadership Bryan County class is slated to begin January 15, 2010. As a graduate, I can tell you this is a great opportunity. Call the Chamber at 912.756.3444 to register.

Shining with Nelson

While writing today’s Turn Around Tuesday, I came across an amazing quote from activist, Noble Prize Winner, Statesman, former South African President and Madiba, Nelson Mandela. 

 

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.

Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It’s not just in some of us; it is in everyone.

And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

For those who are familiar with Turn Around Tuesday, you will be surprised to find that this was my response.

I am not being lazy, I swear. I didn’t have any big Memorial Day plans yesterday that have left me struggling today. Honestly, I am ready to write a full TAT. But, after a quote like that, what else is there really left to say?

Today I encourage you to read that quote again and decide where you fit in. Are you a shiner or a shrinker? At first pass, I think I am a shiner with overwhelming shrinker tendencies. Or, it may be that I am a shrinker with rare moments of shiner greatness. One thing I know for sure - my inner Warrior is dying to be a shiner.

This was followed by an invite to come here and dig into the idea a little further.

So let’s discuss - shiner or shrinker?

Today’s Superhero Cape

“It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.”
- C. S. Lewis, author

One of the easiest things to do is to feel like a failure. Not good enough or smart enough or fast enough…the list goes on. Always watching other folks just to find more things I am lacking. How come I can’t pull that off or participate in that or be involved with that? Where is my superwoman cape?
Fortunately for me, I have the opportunity to discuss these thoughts with a couple a really smart women. During one such conversation, I had an epiphany. I am a wife, a business owner and the mother of four children under the age of 12. There’s my superwoman cape. This is the stage of my life I am in. These are the things that I concentrate on. Leaving the other stuff alone does not create failure - it demonstrates priorities.

In eight too short years, I will be the mother of 4 children between the ages of 10 and 20. That is a totally different place than where I am now. That stage of my life will have its own set of priorities, commitments and challenges. My superwoman cape will change, but it will still be mine.

Today I encourage you to appreciate your cape. At least for today - or the next five minutes - realize that you don’t do it like everybody else because you are unique. While your warrior cannot accomplish all things, the ability to accomplish all things meant for you is there in truckloads. You are perfectly positioned for your journey in this point. Run tomorrow’s race tomorrow. Enjoy today’s events now. It is the only thing you can truly wrap your arms around.

Hey There Parents

It is almost that time of the year again. You can always tell when it is fixing to happen. Bouncing, over excited, giddy, homework forgetting kids are preparing to roar into their summer vacation.

I am looking forward to my kids having a good time. They can’t take themselves to the pool or the park or the beach - so I get to go all those places too. Wonderful benefit.

However, I also worry about the summer brain rot. Three months is a long break from the 3 R’s. And they are expected to fall right back into the swing of things at the beginning of the next school year.

So, my question today is - What kind of activities and learning resources will you use to for your kids this summer?

Special Thanks to Julien Tromeur for the superhero graphic

Just say “Thanks”

“I work with wonderful people who support me. And, my beliefs are that the business needs to serve the family rather than the family serve the business.”
- Kathy Ireland, Model and Entrepreneur

I feel like I have been disconnected from the friends that believe in me the most. Lately, I haven’t been able to stop for coffee, schedule a lunch or make quite as many “hey how are you doing” phone calls. Keeping it together in these interesting times has taken some serious focus.

That’s the funny thing about focus. While totally necessary to excel in an area, it can put a damper on other ones - like noticing the people around you. You see, while I may feel disconnected, I actually am not. And realizing that is nothing short of a compliment to those around me without whom I could do nothing.

Lately, I have not been the supporter or the giver or the provider. Hence, the feeling of disconnect. I have been the needer and the taker. That has, in all honesty, led to some paranoid inadequacy feelings. However, what a slap in the face to those who are taking their time and effort to be there for me. Support comes from those who can out of goodwill not out of a need to create guilt in the receiver.

Today I encourage you to say just “Thank you.” No qualifiers, no fillers, no “oh you shouldn’t have how can I ever repay you” platitudes. Simply thank you. Stripped down, naked, pure gratitude. Appreciation that fills you up with what you needed and honors the person who is offering the gift. Watch, I’ll go first.

Thank you.

Two Months?!?!
Seriously?!?

Yes, seriously. It has in fact been two months since the last edition on TAT hit cyberspace. You have my sincerest apologies. But, I have no regrets.

TAT went on an unplanned hiatus due to the work overload of the producer. Something had to give - TAT was it.

Once TAT ceased to enter mailboxes, I started to get phone calls. What wonderful phone calls they were! You have no idea how much the encouragement to move forward and the support in my decisions meant to me.

As of May 1st, I have hired a full time assistant and she is fantastic! Just in the few days she has been in the office, I have seen a dramatic difference in, well, everything.

And now, back to our regularly scheduled programming!

Open Your Sails

“A ship in port is safe; but that is not what ships are built for. Sail out to sea and do new things.”
- Rear Admiral Grace Hopper (1906-1992)

As a Naval electronic tech, I I heard a lot about Admiral Hopper. She was a pioneer in computer technology development. More interesting to me is the era in which she lived and accomplished so much as a woman. I can only assume obstacles where far more numerous. The women of the early 21st century would do well to remember the tenacity displayed by the women of the early 20th century. In fact we would all do well to reflect on the champions of our past.

Often we find those who have gone before us that inspire us to greater things. We concentrate heavily on the accomplishments and thrill at the journey they took throughout their life. We honor the challenges they overcame and admire their ability to move forward regardless of obstacles.
However, few of us translate these experiences into an example of what we can do for ourselves. For some reason, there is a gap between what we believe what others can achieve and we can accomplish ourselves. It is as if we assume those who have gone before us have some unknown superpower or possess a secret that they didn’t share. They could do all those things, but we can’t.

Today I encourage you to remember that no ship worth is building is meant to stay in port. And no life worth living is compelled by fear and apprehension. Your inner warrior appreciates the accomplishments of those who have gone before you. That warrior is anxious to be among the ranks of those who have sailed fearlessly. Pull up the anchor and be that person who inspires. The potential is in you.

Tis the Season

I will go ahead and admit that I am not crazy about all the hubbub that surrounds Christmas. The stress and loss of focus moves away from my idea of the purpose of the season. However, it never fails to warm my heart to watch those who do embody what this time of year is all about.

Next week, I am going to try to fill this column with contacts. If you have a resource, charity, toy drive…whatever…. drop me a line and let me know.

I look forward to working with you to make the holiday a little brighter for someone else.

Help Yourself and Those Around You

“First it is necessary to stand on your own two feet. But the minute a man finds himself in that position, the next thing he should do is reach out his arms.”

- Kristin Hunter, writer

I am such a fan of personal responsibility and intestinal fortitude. I think we are a noble people when we exercise those traits and a burden to the earth when we do not. I can think of few things more important than taking ownership of your actions and consequences. And there is nothing more human than reaching out to those that need it.

So often we are given the ability to turn ourselves into victims. We are given undeserved outs from situations that we caused. The down side of this is that we will continue to make the same missteps as there is no lesson in a free pass. The unintended consequence is that we become less able to find fulfillment in accomplishments as we are not responsible for our actions.

With this lack of personal responsibility, the trend has been to say “somebody should do something” versus “I can do something.” We assume that an inflated government and over committed community programs will solve the ills of the society. The faceless “somebody” allows us to be comfortable in our own detached state.

Today I encourage you to continue fighting the good fight. You are one of those people who take credit for your place in the world and the decisions you made to get there - both good and bad. You get where you are going not by stepping on others but by bringing them along with you. You are active in creating a world better than the one you were born into. This journey may seem lonely and exhausting. You may feel like you are not making a difference. You are.

It is that time of the Year

Many of serve our fellow man all year long. However, the needs of many are more deeply felt this time of year and the opportunity to help is more widely available. Today I will highlight two.

Most local communities have their version of an empty stocking fund. These groups sponsor families that have found themselves in circumstance that will make this holiday season hard. Almost any search engine will lead you to the correct venue to locate organizations that are helping out less fortunate families this year.

Chicken of the Sea has sponsored a jingle contest. The winning entry will have a truckload of tuna delivered to their food bank. You can vote for the Savannah entry here. And, because it is a good cause, I will tell you that the link will also take you to wherever your local area is. I would like Savannah to win. I would love for more people to participate.

Save the Thinker, Save the World

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”

- Mark Twain

Think about the last time you attended a conference, workshop, retreat, sermon - anything that challenged you to think in a big way and effect a positive change in your life. At the time, you felt profoundly altered. You might have made checklists, voice notes, game plans - whatever. You were just ready to make life better for yourself and those around you.

If you are like most of us, you probably didn’t even get to lunch on the first day before some small thinker starting poking holes and planting doubt. Next thing you know, you’ve convinced yourself that you were crazy to even think that big, the whole plan was ridiculous, you were never enough to begin with and you crawl back in your box. The small thinker feels very accomplished and the world loses out on the wonderful impact you had planned.

How frustrating! Why do people do that? More importantly, why do we let them? We have let a person we wouldn’t trust to organize a book shelf dictate what we are and aren’t capable of. Seriously?

The amazing thing is that, while this sabotage is occurring, you probably had multiple folks who are way cooler than that other flake encouraging you. They know that you are capable of all that and more. They look for ways to help and support. Most importantly, they believe in you and they tell you so.

Today I want to encourage you get back out of your box and dare the small thinker to poke holes. Commit before you come out that you will not allow the small thinker enough face time to give his less than helpful opinion. Instead, seek out your fellow warriors. You already know who they are. Accept their encouragement. Resist the urge to shrug off the compliment. Look for opportunities to return the favor. With all this greatness running around, the small thinker never gets a foot hold.

Congrats to The Busy Woman of the Year!

And we aren’t talking about busy just for the sake of being busy. We are talking about putting your sneakers on and getting it done.

Kris Rice founded Coastal Children’s Advocacy Center in 1994. The Center provides services for children who have been abused or witnesses to violent activity. She provided counseling at Ground Zero. She and her husband are foster parents.

I would like to extent a huge thanks to Kris for all the work that she does for those who cannot do it for themselves. As an admirer of children myself, I deeply appreciate the selflessness of Kris and others like her that answer the call everyday.

And to the Little Black Book and all the sponsors for this amazing event. Kudos for recognizing those in the community who are making a difference in a big way. May we all follow the example of offering up of time and resources to leaving this place a little better off than the way we found it.

Choking on the Apple

How do you eat an elephant?
One bite at a time.
-African Proverb

I watched my two year old eat an apple yesterday. She was given a slice and proceeded to stick the whole thing in her mouth. Didn’t work out too well and it ended up in my hand. Hmm.

Because she had been successful eating apples when given it whole, we went back to that method. She knew she couldn’t put that whole thing in her mouth and began consuming it, one bite at a time. She ate the whole thing. Interesting.

I have crazy big ideas. I have some pretty significant responsibilities. So do you. There are times when I have made a go at one of those enormous sized projects. I am so excited about the prospect that I try to tackle it all at once, only to choke on it and spit it out in the trash. Other times, the bigness of it all is undeniable and I convince myself that I am “not enough” for the job. These times I don’t even try. Either way, I get none of the apple.

Opportunities of condensed learning and inspiration can be like this too. Ever been to a seminar and tried to remodel your entire yard, kitchen, life, the next day? You’ve seen that the improvement works. Why not implement all of it in one big slice of a bite? Because you will choke and it will all end up in the trash.

Today I want to encourage you cut yourself some slack. Unless you have some really cool super powers I don’t know about, you are subject to the same laws of time and and physics as the rest of us. Time will not warp itself for you. Most often, one step at a time is the most effective. You are amazingly talented, incredibly capable and immensely deserving. Just move through the process, one delicious bite at a time.

Big eWomenNetwork Thanks!

I will be talking about Dallas for a minute or two longer. You just have to forgive me. I am still trying to unpack - both figuratively and literally. Because I have not yet had the chance to connect with all the folks I wanted to, here are a few thanks in the interim.

Big thanks to those who went with me and the best roommate ever! To the one that made me feel like a cool kid. To the one that inspired. To the one that dared me to impress myself. To the one who encouraged while listening to my kids in background. To the one who knew I had it in me and made me say so. And to all the others who made my trip to Dallas one that I will not soon forget. You have no idea and I am not sure yet how to tell you.

So instead, I will just keep putting one word in front of the other and hope in the process, you just know.

Commit to the Positive

“People will say things that sting. They sting more when I am raw from my own inner inquisition.”

-Tama Kieves, This Time I Dance!

During Marci Shimoff’s keynote talk at the eWomenNetwork conference, I heard some startling numbers that I don’t doubt one bit. We, as individuals, have 60,000 thoughts a day, 95% of them are repeat thoughts and 80% are negative. Hear that. We think a lot of stuff, over and over again, and most of it is bad. Is it any wonder some of us didn’t feel like getting out of bed today?

I am thinking about how last TAT I told you how nervous I was to be going to Dallas to begin with and that it probably stemmed from a sense of insecurity. Wow! Wanna guess how many of those 60,000 thoughts consisted of negative self talk that reinforced that idea? It is amazing what we allow our inner selves to say. Horrid things that we would not for a minute stand for if said by others out loud. But, we will say it to ourselves, about ourselves, over and over. Interesting.

I have made the commitment to spend a great deal of energy investigating Marci’s thoughts on happiness and Tama’s thoughts on honoring the inner person. Why? Because most everything we come into contact with and the way we feel about it when we get there is not happenstance, but the result of our own personal choice. My personal choice. And 80% negative is not going to be my choice.

Today I want to encourage you talk honestly with yourself about how close to that 80% you are. Consider how that affects you and those around you. Know that this is an exercise I have done and have committed to improving upon. If you need the support, I am here. The time for beating yourself down is over. Life is far too short to be your own worst critic. Time is too valuable to paralyze yourself. Your talents are too important to be trampled on by the lies in your head. You are a warrior!

Getting Ready!

After five wonderful days in Dallas at an incredible conference, I am still trying to process all the information I took in. Some of that is just going to be mental work work me. Some of it will be involve discussion with others.

TAT was presented as A Year of Tuesdays journal format in Dallas. It was very well received and I appreciate those of you who helped me with that. Now, I bring two major pieces of feedback from people who make their living doing this kind of thing. I’d love to get your take on them.

The quotes - they should either be mine or not be there at all.

The layout - to keep it from becoming outdated so quickly, group by subject and not by actual date (i.e. January 1, 2009).

I would love to hear what you think!

The Case against Fear

“No passion so effectually robs the mind of all its powers of acting and reasoning as fear.”

-Edmund Burke, A Philosophical Inquiry into the Origin of Our Ideas of the Sublime and Beautiful (1756)

Tomorrow, I fly to Dallas for my first ever eWomen Network conference. The resources, connections and possibilities are endless. I have some big goals for this conference and have been looking forward to it for a long time. Now that it is tomorrow, I will be honest with you, I am a little nervous.

It’s funny that I even say that here. Quite a public place to out an insecurity. But, I think that’s just what needs to happen. Go ahead and address it for what it is so that I can effectively deal with it now so it doesn’t mess me up over the next five days. Fear will trip me up every time.
Fear, or it’s little helper nervous, causes me to do strange things - none of which are productive. It is a big waste of time, money and resources to be unproductive. Moreover, it just isn’t who I am. I am not in the habit of not being who I am.

I think we all have times like this - opportunities that are golden and the little butterflies that go along with it. I don’t think it is lack of confidence so much as a healthy appreciation of the opportunities that lay ahead.

Today I want to encourage you to find your center - that place where you are on the top of your game and productive. Remember who you are and why you are. Sure, there are going to be times where nerve, even fear, peak around the corner, but don’t let them hang out. You are never as good as when you have full confidence in that inner warrior to move through these situations flawlessly.

Look Out!

Coming soon to an inbox near you! The all new Turn Around Tuesday!

We have been talking for a few weeks about TAT suggestions, feedback and whatnot. You all have really been wonderful and incredibly supportive. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.

Because of that support (and a few other events), TAT is getting a makeover. Of course, I think it’s great just the way it is, but every girl needs a new do once in a while.

So, be on the look out over the next two weeks. You’ll see some pretty fantastic changes, interesting announcements and, hopefully, little bits that make your Tuesday better!

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