So, I am not really in danger (but, I can pretend to be if that’s motivating for you.)  No sinking ships or crucial moments of peril.  But I do have questions – important ones even – and I need your help.  Ok, maybe not “important” the way geo-politics, national economy, and the season opener of Survivor are important.  But “April” important. 

1. I have my first speaking engagement.  I am very excited and prepared (Phil, I am lifting my lid!)  I have been asked by Mary Morris, an Executive Area Manager for Arbonne, to conduct training for her group.  She really liked Flip Flippen’s The Flip Side and wanted me to talk about the critical constraints.  Flip’s organization was very gracious and gave me permission to use the their materials.  The book deals with identifying and resolving those things that trip you up. 
   

   Question – How do you feel about discussing overcoming negatives? When talking about overcoming negatives, what about the environment, approach, or training make you feel more comfortable?

2. I have changed the layouts of all three websites – the main homepage, Making Life Work for You, and Beautiful Chaos.  The intent was to provide continuity to the three venues while still maintaining the uniqueness I feel each of them possess.
   

   Question – What do you think?

3. I don’t think there are enough visuals on the site.  I love going to blogs that have great supporting graphics and pictures for their posts.
   

   Question – Where is you favorite source for finding great pictures or artwork? How do you ensure that you are respecting personal property and copyright?

And I guess that about covers the pressing things on my mind right this second.  But if you have been around here at all, you already know there is bound to be more coming up!

Big thanks in advance for all your help.  And do me another favor (man, she’s asking for a lot today!)  If you have resources that better help answer my questions, please feel free to link them up in the comments.  I know some people feel strange about linky loving themselves or others in the comment section – but as appreciated guests, you are more like family and I hope you feel at home!

Ok, so I am a little late.  Dean will understand, he is just that kind of guy.

Really neat things have been happening over at JJL and right here in my little world.  It seems like I have found myself in the midst of so many new things that I hope I can keep it down to five.

Over at JJL, we have been talking about things we need to unlearn.

1. Phil asked the great question – “How do you raise your lid?”  I was confronted head on with the fact that I need to unlearn holding it shut.

2. Joanna taught me a few things when she discussed the power of should. 

Sometimes it can feel like tangleweed, wrapping itself around hopes, dreams and possibilities, stifling the life out of us with requirements and instructions and obligations.

She’s right – why worry about the “I should?” I have plenty to do with the stuff that “I am.”

3. I discussed how I need to unlearn mediocrity. You know, that fantastic waste of time that is just getting by instead of going big.

There are some things that I have learned – this month they are fun things. Timothy is right – you just have to laugh sometimes.

4. Yoga is hard

 5. There are few things cooler than a froggy tape dispenser.

I love Sundays! Naps, kids, reflection, and planning.  That’s what great days are made of.  Last Sunday I was anxious and excited.  Yesterday I was exhausted and mostly satisfied.

Mostly.

Packed up schedules are not new to me.  If you have ever been over to my other blog, you know that it is titled My Beautiful Chaos for a reason.  And I love the pace that is my life.  Most of the time.

Most days I do not get around to everything on my “to do” list.  However, these are usually things that can be delegated in the form of “honey, please”, children chores, or friendly favors.

Last week was not that way.  I had tons to do, places to be, and it was all me.  I had a plan, and it was good for the most part.  The only downside (and I knew this when I was going through it) was the lack of wiggle room.  And what do you do with a schedule that has no wiggle room? Create it!

When things get busy, things get skipped.  You have to decide what can and what cannot be missed.  I had to do that a lot last week.  When going through my weekly reflection and planning, I saw that the things that were skipped typically did not change from day to day.

1. The gym – I did not go once last week.  Ugh.  It is the hardest thing to schedule and the easiest thing to duck out on.  My schedule is such that a workout buddy would basically be like a firefighter on call, so I am accountable to no one. 
2. Just because emails – I love these.  Emails that are sent to family, friends, and associates just to touch base because you don’t see them all the time.  Or responses to these emails.  These were put on hold until Saturday. I am so very fortunate to have people who understand.  I would unwise to make this habit.
3. Scheduling lunches – I never eat alone, or at least not if I can help it.  One of the tasks I have every week is to make sure I have lunches scheduled for next week.  This is the best way I know of to stay current with people who are important to me and create better relationships with those I do not know well but would like to.  This one was skipped with a reason – there was so much going on last week, that I needed to make sure I had plenty of room for follow up this week.  It was a smart move as it happened just that way.
4. Grocery shopping – You don’t even want to see my list.  It is long and has gained today’s highest priority.
5. Laundry – Ugh.  I don’t even want to talk about it.

Those are the top five things that routinely got skipped last week.  And, if I have another week like that, the list will probably not change too much. This leads me to believe that we all have those things that are the first to go on the to do list.

I’d love to hear yours.

The welcoming nature of the blog community never ceases to amaze me.  We are all on a path to our own ‘imi ola and are more than happy to help each other along the way.

Josh Hinds does this on a regular basis.  Over at Business Networking Advice, he seeks out those he thinks can effectively answer the following questions

• How do you define Business Networking and why do you feel it is important?
• Can you share one or two ideas that someone could put into practice that would help them to improve their business networking skills?
• Do you see any common mistakes people tend to make when it comes to attempting to make business connections? If so what are they and what corrections could they make in your opinion which would help them to be more effective in their approach towards networking?

This is good for Josh in his mission to help develop his business and create “win-win” relationships.  It is good for those he interviews because of the added exposure it provides.

It was really good for me because it made me “noodle” (ala Chris Cree) exactly what my mission and strategy was for networking.  I had a rough framework, but probing Josh’s questions really allowed me to focus and assess.  If he never used it on his site, it was still a wonderful exercise for me.

But, as luck would have it, Josh posted it. You can read the full interview here. Don’t put too much stock in Phil’s comments – I paid him to say that.

A while back, Making Life Work for You was honored with two awards.

According the the honor of these awards, I can now pass them on. This has taken some time and thought – not because I couldn’t think of some, but I have so MANY!

Fortunately, some of my favorites have already been awarded

• Rosa Say
• Dave Rothacker
• Tim Milburn
• Dwayne Melancon
• Joanna Young
• Dean Boyer
• Rich G.
• Robyn McMaster
• Char
• Two Write Hands

Must admit – that makes it easier.

The rule for Thinking Blogger is five.  The original Rockin’ Girl Blogger used 5 too.  That sounds good to me.

Thinking Blogger Award

Make it Great- Phil Gerbyshak makes it impossible to be negative.  He has a smart way of just making negativity look stupid.  He is also spearheading a very thoughtful project on leadership over at JJL

Carpe Factum - Timothy Johnson makes my brain hurt (those who know me know that I mean that as a great compliment.)  He strips away the rhetorical mumbo jumbo of management and is applicable as a result – not to mention I learn a new word almost every time I visit.

The Arizona Mortgage Guru- It is no small thing when you carry the label “Guru”.  Shailesh Ghimire makes it look easy.  Everything you wanted to know, things you didn’t even know you should know, and things you thought you knew – Shailesh covers it all with your best interests in mind and an easy style.

The Phoenix Real Estate Guy - Jay Thompson embodies everything that is great about the real estate profession.  He is my benchmark for the way I do business.  I read his blog like a manual for success.  Why? Because it is!  Not in the real estate industry? Go anyway – you’ll be so glad you did.

Sucessful Blog - Now, I don’t for a minute think that Liz Strauss has never gotten one of these.  But, I didn’t see it and I am NOT taking the chance.  Liz has me saying, “Man, I wish I had said that,” more than any person I know or don’t know.  Need to get in touch with you in a real way? Liz creates the most beautiful path to get there.

Rockin’ Girl Blogger

RERevealed- Lani Anglin is my BBF (best bloggy friend).  She makes me a better person.  She gives me a safe place to be totally transparent, flex new ideas, and nurse old wounds. Oh and she writes a great blog too!

Mitten Musing – Speaking of transparency – I have said it before, this girl has got it!  I never miss a post.  If there is ever a definition of “Rockin’ Girl Blogger” she is it. Zero pretense, zero alternative motive, zero apology, awesomeness in spades.

Kris Berg – Going to just name her by name because she is a blogging phenom.  She writes in numerous places – if you miss any one of them, you are missing out.  Frankly, it’s hard to keep up but I will run ragged trying.  Finding her is just that good!

Think Positive - Kirsten Harrell graciously supplies me with my daily inspiration.  She also offers the extra push when I need to breathe deep.  This lady understands that people want to be inspired, they want to be empowered, and they need to be able to wrap their mind around it.  Kirsten does this and it’s flawless.

Typically after an award, you say congratulations.  Doesn’t seem appropriate here.

Instead – Thank you all very much.  I am better because I know you.

Last week I discussed why I blogged and why I felt it was an effective thing for a real estate agent to do.  As she always does, Lani made me think a little more.  Her comment was great.

…but when you provide a real time forum for clients to anonymously learn about you, you become trustworthy, approachable and they will already know you and have given you a virtual handshake before you even know their name.

That got me thinking…what about the Handshake?

Long story short…my dad has three daughters and zero sons.  So, I have built chicken coops, dug drainage fields, changed fuel pumps and brake lines, thrown a football…and learned the art of the handshake.

Firm but not hard, direct but not confrontational, eye to eye but not challenging.  Does that make sense?

When I met my husband, it was in a work environment.  He would later tell me that my handshake was memorable.

These are real life handshakes.  You know whose hand you are shaking and what situation you are both currently in.  There is tone of voice, body language, and facial expressions.  Lots of information gets passed during this process.

But what are the characteristics of a virtual handshake? I will tell you some things I have noticed.

• Great Bloggers give great virtual handshakes.  They are warm and inviting without being weird and overbearing.
• Virtual handshakes take longer than real ones.  The response time is different and the non verbal communication is unavailable.  Therefore it takes more time to glean the same information.
• The anatomy of a virtual handshake is basically the same as a real one – the offer, the acceptance, the release, and the continued conversation.
• Commenting a few times on another blog and not getting any acknowledgement that you joined the conversation feels the same as when you go to accept a handshake and they do the pull back, “ha ha got you” trick.

But, the anonymity of it all makes the virtual handshake so much different.  The vehicle of the keyboard that allows us to reach so many becomes the obstacle of knowing exactly who you are traveling to.  This is where I draw a blank and look for you to fill it.

• How do you see the virtual handshake – or even the real one for that matter?
• Do you get  impressions from the virtual handshake  – how are they different or the same than the real one?
• How do you overcome the obstacle of the anonymous?  Do you even think about it?
• What goes through your mind when you think “virtual handshake”?

Last night I went through my schedule to prepare for the upcoming week.  It is a big one.  Big projects, big meetings, big events.  I must admit – it is near overwhelming (think fire hydrant drinking).

Don’t get me wrong, I am NOT complaining.  Things are busy because life is good.  I am so very thankful for that.  But, I must get my mind right before I wake my kids up.  This is a daily activity for me, but rarely as necessary as it is today.

Big times call for big coaching.  Rosa is going to fill that role for me today – and she’s probably asleep with the time difference and all.  Another power of the blog. 

Rosa has an article that I have bookmarked for times such as this.  The article is intended to help those discover their Ho’ohana (“working with passion, with full intention and with definitive purpose”).  Through her gentle guidance and Chris Cree’s “hey how about this?” questions, I have got the frame work pretty nailed down.

But the steps to finding your ho’ohana are also a great way to maintain your focus and move through the journey without tripping yourself up.

First of all, you need to stop allowing the magnitude of your own life to intimidate you.

Intimidate – to make timid or fearful; frighten; to compel or deter by or as if by threats

None of those things sound like an effective way to get through this week.  However, I would be lying and preparing myself for failure if I didn’t freely admit that there was plenty of “magnitude” to be intimidated about.

Denial is not a river in Egypt but both will wash you away.  So, I confront the possibility of my life intimating me head on.

• My calendar is detailed and organized – no flying by the seat of my pants this week.
• My task list is organized
• My priorities are set
• My preparation is solid 

My life belongs to me.  What I do with it is my responsibility.  My choices, my consequences.  I look to my Apocalypto quote.  “I am Jaguar Paw.  This is my jungle and I am not afraid.”

Ho‘ohana is very much about focus

And focus is about coffee.  Seriously (okay, so I was serious), having focus begins with determining what you are focusing on.  I am dedicated to going big.  I understand what those thoughts and dreams are.  But that is not my primary focus this week.  This is not a “planning” week – this a doing week.  This week is full of action steps.  My focus is putting action to idea.  This is a time to put quality checks in my “to do” boxes.  Quality checks.  That’s the focus.  Putting the flesh on the statements I make about what I can do and the fulfillment of guarantees. 

The “work” of Ho‘ohana is not just job

This reminds me that if I wanted “just a job” I could have picked goals that were much easier to obtain. I don’t. I want ‘Imi ola (“to seek life….our purpose in life is to seek its highest possible form”).  This is imperative to remember when I get tired – and I do get tired.  Or stressed, or overwhelmed, or discouraged…all those things that zap your drive if not anticipated with a battle-plan to overcome them.  Yes, a battle-plan – it is just that important.

You are better than you give yourself credit for. You achieve more than you take notice of.

Sound self important? I used to think so and shied away from this type of thinking.  It’s not. It is the power of a positive mind.  It’s also common sense when you think about it.

If I wasn’t good at what I do, I would be doing a disservice by offering myself to my clients.  If I don’t take note of my achievements, how do I measure progress and continue the journey of ’Imi ola?  Knowing that I can accomplish what I have set out to do is the crux of effective action.  Recognizing what I have done today is the building block for what I will do tomorrow.

Inspiration is great.  How about offering some of your own. 

• How do you deal with intimidation of “magnitude?”
• Do you have a plan for getting your mind right?
• Do you have a battle-plan?
• What’s the one step of your day you can’t do without?